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What could possibly go wrong?

Lifelike figure of a Neanderthal Man in the Neanderthal Museum in Mettmann by Duesseldorf, Northrhine-Westphalia, Germany. Image shot 2006. Exact date unknown.

Hans-Dieter Neanderthal, Ph.D.

Another liberal plot to take over the world has been leaked to the press.   Get this: a superior but extinct humanoid race is about to be unleashed on the world by Harvard University.

And, as we all know, since all intelligent human beings are liberals, breeding these ultra-brainy beings who once roamed much of the earth will mean the extinction of conservatism.

Yeah.  Wow.  Never mind what Darwin said about survival of the fittest.  Imagine the laws these beings could enact!  Utopia, here we come....  out with the gun-totin' , bible thumpin' trailer trash.

With proper funding from George Soros and the NSF, this breeding program might actually turn out to be the crowning glory of  President Obama's second term.  Rumor has it that women are lining up at Harvard to take part in this noble experiment.

Wanted: 'Adventurous woman' to give birth to Neanderthal man - Harvard professor seeks mother for cloned cave baby

* Professor George Church of Harvard Medical School believes he can reconstruct Neanderthal DNA
* His ambitious plan requires a human volunteer willing to allow the DNA to be put into stem cells, then a human embryo


They're usually thought of as a brutish, primitive species. So what woman would want to give birth to a Neanderthal baby?

Yet this incredible scenario is the plan of one of the world’s leading geneticists, who is seeking a volunteer to help bring man’s long-extinct close relative back to life.

Professor George Church of Harvard Medical School believes he can reconstruct Neanderthal DNA and resurrect the species which became extinct 33,000 years ago.

His scheme is reminiscent of Jurassic Park but, while in the film dinosaurs were created in a laboratory, Professor Church’s ambitious plan requires a human volunteer.

He said his analysis of Neanderthal genetic code using samples from bones is complete enough to reconstruct their DNA. He said: ‘Now I need an adventurous female human. ‘It depends on a hell of a lot of things, but I think it can be done.’

Professor Church’s plan would begin by artificially creating Neanderthal DNA based on genetic code found in fossil remains. He would put this DNA into stem cells.

These would be injected into cells from a human embryo in the early stages of life.  It is thought that the stem cells would steer the development of the hybrid embryo on Neanderthal lines, rather than human ones.

After growing in the lab for a few days, the ‘neo-Neanderthal’ embryo would be implanted in the womb of a surrogate mother – the volunteer. Professor Church, 58, is a pioneer in synthetic biology who helped initiate the Human Genome Project that mapped our DNA.

He says Neanderthals were not the lumbering brutes of the stereotype, but highly intelligent. Their brains were roughly the same size as man’s, and they made primitive tools.

He believes his project could benefit mankind.

Read more HERE.  Prepare to be fascinated...

But, wait a minute...  maybe the Harvard professor is not the first to go down this daring route?   What if someone beat him to the punch around 87 years ago?   Startling proof of such an experiment is offered below:


Smarter than all other humans, and smart as the Devil:  Super Sabio! Inteligentisimo! El seso maximo! Sabelotodo supremo!


4 comments to What could possibly go wrong?

  • Rayarena

    It seems like a monstrous thing to subject a child to. Imagine if you're that child? Born out of an experiment and the only member of a species of human that went extinct 33,000 years ago. You'd become famous yes, but a sideshow freak, stigmatized, ridiculed and marginalized.

  • Honey

    On the other hand, according to Professor Eire, some examples of this individual already exist and are worshiped and live quite nicely. Three are in Cuba for starters. (mustn't forget that monkey man Chavez).

  • Rayarena

    True, I missed the point of the piece! LOL.

  • Lynx

    "It could benefit mankind" sadly, there are those who believe it, and morons like this can make this statement and the press loves it. I'm sure he can get a welfafe mom that already has 10 children to bear this one, and get added food stamps to boot! He can send an alert to the obamaphones for volunteers.