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Instruction Manual for the Perfect Dictator

Enrique Del Risco on his blog Enrisco (my translation):

Instruction Manual for the Perfect Dictator

  1. Never stop appealing to the people. Chances are someone is going to feel you're talking to them.
  2. Promise much, but above all, punish the rich (the most obedient among them will become honorary poor people).
  3. Find a foreign enemy you can cite as you squash the internal opposition.
  4. What you say is of no importance: Remember, your biggest enemies are your scruples and your conscience. Rid yourself of them immediately.
  5. Give care and protection to your best allies: Envy, resentment, fear, and hope. Above all, the first three. Hope is NOT the last one that is lost.
  6. Don't be afraid to commit any crime as long as you constantly accuse your opponents of having the same intentions they accuse you of having.
  7. Always remind everyone: Your intentions have always been good. It's the other guys who stop you from fulfilling them completely.
  8. The people will never turn their backs on you, but there will be occasions when they are not able to rise to the level of your dreams. They will have time to mature.
  9. Speeches are great, but remember that the people mature much quicker when you beat them.
  10. The purpose of speeches is to explain why those who are beaten deserve to be beaten: Because they are not loyal to the people.
  11. Of course you detest violence. It is the other guys who leave you with no other option.
  12. Convince everyone that you are seeking the good of all humanity. Later, if there are those who complain about their lack of humane conditions because they prefer to be worms, squalid, Yankee-lovers, scum, maladjusted, oligarchs, or traitors, that is not your fault.
  13. Avoid elections at all costs. Even though you can win them, they are dangerous because they propagate the perverse idea that not everyone adores you.

2 comments to Instruction Manual for the Perfect Dictator

  • asombra

    #1 should be:

    Never stop invoking "the people." Someone or other is bound to feel alluded to.

    #10 should be:

    The purpose of speeches is to explain why those who are beaten deserve to be: because they are not "the people."

    And love the photo: the moron and the fraudulent president wearing faux military bling.

  • asombra

    How about Ratso as a rapper? He could call himself Queen-B (in honor of Freddie Mercury, of course).