That would be you, eurotrash, sucking up to me, el barbudo, not because you stood for anything, but because you wanted to get back at those gringos. See, I know how to play you like a bongo. Being a haughty Spanish plantation grandee’s son who can’t even dance, I can’t exactly play real bongos, either … but I sure can play you.
So now I show my ‘gratitude’ to you fools for giving me the diplomatic recognition I sought by thumping you right in the cojones. You’re so easy to gull, all I had to do was release a couple dissidents from my dungeons, and you thought you had your proof that I had ‘changed.’ You girly-men.
Today I had my Future Parks Keeper, err, Foreign Minister, (pathetic little man, I’ll make him dogcatcher if he doesn’t ‘arf’ just right) declare you ‘disgraceful’ for daring to bring up my abysmal human rights record. I made him say you Europeans ‘automatically’ sided with the U.S., just to lump you in with those godawful cowboys. This’ll be enough to neuter you for awhile, and I’ll snicker at your next move, which will be to appease me even more.
Then, to twist the machete a little, I had him say this:
“The European Union can’t talk with Cuba, on the one hand, and vote with the United States, on the other. That will make (Europe) lose credibility,” he asserted.
Heh heh. See? It’s either-or. Or as the gringos warned, you can’t negotiate with me, you can only take orders. Nice to discover, after the fact, no? And this, before you and I have had so much as a chance to kiss on the lips for the Yahoo! News photo slideshow. That’s what you get. But don’t think I didn’t see how you smiled earlier when the gringos shreiked about your recognition of me. You had your fun. Now I’m having mine. Every pleasure has its price. And there’s gonna be a whole cigar-box more of it coming along because I know you guys. You signed away your souls, ignoring the warning of Vaclav Havel, who told you not to do it. And now you can’t back away. You’re not man enough. So now you get me, suckers, and I intend to abuse you every step of the way. You’ll have to go along. But you know you like it.