Condo for sale!

Tired of the rat race? Had it up to here with the trials and tribulations of homeownership in your neck of the woods? Property taxes too high? Scared of eminent domain coming to your neighborhood?

I got just the thing for you:

Condo For Sale

2 bedroom, 1 bath, furnished, 3yrs. old, elevator, secure bldg. garage, balcony, faces quiet side street. Building has generator and international title.

Furniture imported from Canada. Discreet. All visitors admitted.

At only $175, 000, it’s a steal and it even comes with a generator!!!

And remember, folks, when it comes to real estate, it’s all about location, location, location.

/sarcasm

14 thoughts on “Condo for sale!”

  1. Val, forgive me for being naive, but am I reading too much into the phrase ?Discreet. All visitors admitted?? What does this mean, if anything?

  2. Dave,

    I cant be certain, but my guess is that while most buildings where foreigners live or stay do not allow Cubans to enter (per the government’s rules) this particular building “discreetly allows all visitors.”

  3. Maybe some American castroite will be foolish enough to buy and then wouldn’t it be sweet if the state decides to “redistribute” the property?

  4. I wonder who’s going to buy and why … somehow I don’t trust castro’s “imminent domain” laws (roll-eye smilie here)

  5. “International title,” eh? Must mean “jointly owned with feedel.” With of course the requisite commission payable to “el maximo” realtor into one of his Swiss bank accounts. Canadian furniture? Or could it be confiscated Cuban furniture re-imported from Canada? As my ex-Habanero friend related years ago, when he found out the family furniture they had left behind had “somehow wound up at an auction in Canada.”

    Next, feedel will start selling cars via the “reverse instalment plan,” whereby the deluded and other useful fools and fellow-travelers will pay for the cars in installments and after making all payments, the cars will be delivered(?). As another evil-genius marketer did many moons ago with the Volskwagen. Except no Beetles were delivered under said plan…but someone pocketed mucho Reichsmarks.

  6. The seller is probably a Canadian businessman going home after a failed venture.
    I can’t wait for some idiot to buy this and then a few months later have a Cuban government official confiscate the property, as they have done in the past.

  7. “Discreet” in this situation means that Cubans, including Cuban women(girls), will be allowed to enter and sleep over should they desire to do so.
    The price includes some US$80-90K in profit my countryman wishes to pocket. Those condos were for sale in 2000-2001 for about US$85,000. One bedroom would start from US$65,000. They terminated those sales after only 2 years, but all units were sold or so they say. Some penthouses were priced well over $200,000. How many were purchased by foreigners, I don’t know, but I am sure some were taken over by castro before they found an international tenant. I know about at least 5 such condo buildings around Havana and not all of them have been finished yet. My advise, do not try to buy, because all those worries and doubts expressed buy you guys are well founded. I know about property “take-over” by that s.o.b. first hand.
    Steve Marshall, the guy who was one of the first pushing for development of condominiums for international buyers, seems to have left “La Isla Grande” already, and his Travel agency “Tour & Marketing” is now controlled by the government. Did he sell the business or was it a “friendly take over”? Who knows? By the way, that 5th avenue condominium looks nice.
    Dariusz

  8. If anybody is interested, fine, but consider it rent. Think about how long you’ll actually have the property before castro takes it back. If you’re rich and the money won;t hurt you and you think you’ll get a couple years out of it, fine. But as soon as castro sees that the market has run dry, it’ll be confiscation time.

    As for Estrada, I kind of like the guy (thanks to surreal life). But all he’s selling is lots, not homes. And I have to assume utilities are extra (paying to bring in a power line costs TONS!), you’ll end up with a place that’s three inches from your neighbor’s house, and there will be housing association fees that would beat your mortgage payment in lots of places.

    Again, if you’re rich – it’s a nice area. Just don’t believe the price or anything close to it.

  9. Oh yeah, ref “discreet”, I think they’re referring to the idea you can bring in 13 year old girls and nobody will report you.

    A certain bearded scumbag might send somebody to collect a “political donation” from you tho.

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