Alan Garcia, ite la comistes, caballo!
That’s right, Alan Garcia, the once-icky former president of Peru, has come up with a winning formula for winning an election in Peru:
Beating the hell out of Hugo Chavez!
Oh mannnn this feels good!!!!!!!!!!!
That was pretty much Alan’s whole campaign. Beating Hugo Chavez. He wasn’t shy about it, either. He called Chavez a scoundrel, a ‘little dictator’ and a wife beater. He was so cool.
What does this say about Peru’s voters? It says they HATE Hugo Chavez. It says they HATE Evo Morales. It says they HATE fidel castro. It says you can be the ickiest guy on earth but so long as you beat the hell out of castro and Chavez, you have some redeeming value, enough to give your vote to, and keep Chavez’s disgusting pawn and viceroy out of power in Peru.
Alan Garcia, gross as he was, was smart enough to recognize that much. So now he’s president of Peru and Hugo Chavez is out on his ear. Garcia might even become a good president of Peru now that he’s got a second chance. All because he was willing to publicly beat the hell out of Hugo Chavez to please Peru’s voters.
castro is screaming and throwing things as we read this. He’s been dealt a nasty blow in this hemisphere, will see a corresponding loss of influence and Mexico may soon follow.
WE LOVE THE PERUVIANS!!!!!
Wooooo Hoooooo!!!!!! VIVA PERU!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I have a Publius roundup here.
UPDATE: Cigar Mike Pancier has a fantastic suggestion: We all eat ceviche to celebrate the turning of the communist tide in Peru! Ummmmm, Peruvian ceviche!!!!
Source: Wikipedia, PROMPERU
Thank God. A victory for Garcia is a loss for Chavez. Me thinks I will eat some seviche this week to celebrate.