Hell for fidel

El Machete has put to words something we have all thought of: what will hell be like for fidel castro. He’s broken it down to a weekly routine.

My personal favorite is Fridays:


After a night of “rest,” he starts his morning with a chore: every toilet in the first 2 rings of hell must be thoroughly cleaned – using only his beard.
After his chore is completed, he’s gathered up with Hitler and Pol Pot in a spectacular deathmatch for Satan’s entertainment. Their only weapons are dull spoons laced with the stinging cells of jellyfish. They must pummel each other until only one is left standing. The losers must die a thousand horrific deaths based on their worst fears and is made to feel the suffering they caused while alive. The winner only dies 999 deaths.

My only question is, will it be on Pay Per View?

6 thoughts on “Hell for fidel”

  1. Called DISHTV and they haven’t heard about it yet. Rumour is that Univision has bought the rights though. The latest out of Cuba is that there is a mad rush of people on their rooftops trying to catch the signal. The US Interests Section is going to put up a Jumbotron right away.
    I’ll pass on the rest as it comes in. 🙂

  2. … at bedtime, he bunks with Ernest Hemingway, who won’t stop talking all night about fishing, hunting, and his boat at the marina …. bla bla bla bla …. no rest ever ever ever forever ….

  3. The rumor has been proved itself to be baseless.
    Castro is heading to Argentina tomorrow.To me the
    vital point is to change the cuban situation for
    the better and put castro and his cronies behind
    bars,to die is an easy way-out for dictatos,genocides,etc.

  4. I’m with Ralph … I’m enjoying the whole saddam hussein situation, just because I’m picturing castro in the same position-

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