Death arrives in Argentina

By Daniel Duquenal

So here I am tonight watching my favorite Venezuelan talk show, Alo Ciudadano. As a joke they are following the arrival of the “leaders” the Mercosur summit to be held in Cordoba, Argentina. So there arrives Chavez, talks into any mic that crosses his path. He does not do that in Venezuela just in case an “opposition” mic were to ask him a real question. But here in Argentina he is all “bon enfant”. He drops the news, fidel is coming.

Yes, Castro who was buried about a week ago is doing fine and coming to Argentina.

The Alo Ciudadano crew points out that it is rather normal for castro to be sick, to be almost dead a few days before he travels. Amiably they chat about the castro trips to Venezuela, including the one in 1989 when now hated Carlos Andres Perez used to be castr’so best Caribbean pal. Then, the fidel security was so tight that there was even rumors of a double. At this point the crew also points out that the only certainty about castro coming is the Chavez announcement. Of course, if anyone knows whether fidelito is coming it ought to be mini-me.

Now things become more interesting, the arrivals of Lula, Bachelet and Kirchener are tight run affairs, no interviews no nothing, out of the airport A.S.A.P.. All of course came in only one plane.

Then, live through argie TV, is it a bird, is it a flying red nosed reindeer? No! it is super tyrant, fidel mismo. But wait, as the Cubana plane is taxing there is ANOTHER Cubana plane landing. fidelito comes in two planes! “Which one?” is babbling the now pitch fever press corp wondering like crazy (while the Venezuelan crew is now laughing their heads off!). the mystery is almost unbearably stupid. A third plane from Cuba is also announced but not confirmed.

Eventually two doors of one plane open. I notice how clean and polished and shiny is the Cubana plane, cleaner than any of the other ones I saw. Funny how the “leader” of the poorest of the country to the summit is the one that comes with the most planes and the best kept ones….

So? Which door will it be? The press cannot hold anymore its self masturbating suspense. I keep watching because, heck, it is not every day that you see so many people making total asses of themselves live on TV. A new meaning for reality shows…

So finally from the main door (duh!) fidel comes out the picture of health. He does, though, hold to the bar as he goes down. The press and the small crowd is fawning and gawking as you can imagine.

End of story. Now a few questions:

What is Castro doing at a trade summit of the Mercosur
What is Cuba that has nothing to sell sending its boss tot he Mercosur meeting?
What is the only unelected leader of Lat Am doing at a club meeting where the first requirement to enter (and to be invited?) is that you are an elected leader, or a democratic state, where the opposition does not rot in jail?
Why are Bachelet or Lula playing along? (Of peronist Kirchener anything can be expected)
Is the newly leftist tinted Mercosur sending us a message?
How long will Castro keep conning the LatAm left?

At least there is one piece of good news here: after 8 years of B.S. chavismo, few are impressed with fidelito in Venezuela. I suppose that there is some hope though I wonder how long mini-me will allow us to keep laughing at fidel’s bad taste antics.

Daniel Duquenal is the writer and editor if Venezuela News and Views.

2 thoughts on “Death arrives in Argentina”

  1. Castro is already showing signs of age.

    Yesterday, during the Mercosur summit not only did Castro quote the wrong figures for Argentina’s infant mortality rate, but when President Kirshner corrected him, Castro, smiling like a “fool,” looked at his watch and asked “What time is it?”

    At this point you could hear the person sitting next to Castro say … No, no, he is talking about the infant mortality rate….

    I wonder what’s next!

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