BREAKING NEWS!!!! A BABALU EXCLUSIVE!!!

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Must credit Babalu for this brilliant and absolutely intrepid work of Citizen Journalism….

BREAKING NEWS: Havana, Cuba
Monday, November 13, 2006; 2:30 pm.

While news media sources around the world speculate as to the health and fate of Cuban leader fidel castro, word on the street is that no one knows what the hell is going on. But, sources who wish to remain anonymously anonymous in their anonimity, tell us that should the 80 year old dictator still be alive and able to return to power, his rejuvination and rehabiliation will have been a direct result of the Miami Mafia extremist right wing community’s lobbying efforts and support for the US trade embargo and sanctions. Thus, all of the dictator’s crimes against humanity will, in fact, also be ipso facto the fault of the same community mentioned above.

Phone calls to fidel castro’s bedside night table were not returned. Cuban-American community spokeperson Pepe Pinguo, via telephone, had this to say in response to the accusations mentioned above:

“Alabaooo. Mira que ustedes hablan mierda, caballeros. Vayanse ya to’os pa’l carajo, no ven que estoy mirando la novela, cojones?”

We’ll have more details on this breaking news story as they come in.

12 thoughts on “BREAKING NEWS!!!! A BABALU EXCLUSIVE!!!”

  1. OT Breaking News (kind of): Sen. Mel Martinez is going to replace Ken Mehlman as RNC chairman.

    Good thing you Flordians elected a Republican governor, because Charlie Crist will appoint his replacement in the senate. Katherine Harris?

  4. I’m not too thrilled at the prospect of Martinez as RNC Chair. The amnesty bill, the “Schiavo talking points” memo thing… he doesn’t seem to have done anything commendable yet as a senator.

  5. I just read that Giuliani formed a presidential exploratory committee. I have to start doing my homework for ’08. This includes consideration of opinions here. What do you guys think of Giuliani?

  6. U.S.: Castro’s health is deteriorating
    November 12, 2006

    By KATHERINE SHRADER
    Associated Press Writer

    WASHINGTON (AP) — The government believes Fidel Castro’s health is deteriorating and that the Cuban dictator is unlikely to live through 2007.

    That dire view was reinforced last week when Cuba’s foreign minister backed away from his prediction the ailing Castro would return to power by early December. “It’s a subject on which I don’t want to speculate,” Felipe Perez Roque told The Associated Press in Havana.

    U.S. government officials say there is still some mystery about Castro’s diagnosis, his treatment and how he is responding. But these officials believe the 80-year-old leader has cancer of the stomach, colon or pancreas.

    He was seen weakened and thinner in official state photos released late last month, and it is considered unlikely that he will return to power or survive through the end of next year, said the U.S. government and defense officials. They spoke on condition of anonymity because they were not authorized to speak publicly about the politically sensitive topic.

  9. Rudy is probably the only one who would not think twice about taking his gloves off against Hitlery. He’s a former prosecutor. Did pretty good job cleaning up NYC crime. Would get my money if he ran today even if I don’t agree with his amoral attitude about other issues.

    I don’t see anything else on the horizon now populated by wimpy Republicans.

    Can’t be a girly man against Her Royal B****ness.

  10. Can Mel handle both jobs?

    OK I’m starting to have second thoughts on Mel being head of the RNC. I’m not liking this pick at all, but it’s nice to see a fellow cuban rising up to the top of a political party. I truely believe Michael Steele would’ve been a much more attractive candidate for the position.

    It’s going around the internet that Bush picked Mel because of his support for his beloved amnesty bill. If true, I would be truely disappointed in not just Bush, but also the entire GOP for letting this happen. No amnesty PLEASE!

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