Miss John Edwards speaks

Not as much as ours if you get elected, you dolt:

Dumont, Ia. — Democratic presidential candidate John Edwards squeezed into a pair of Spandex bike shorts today and pedaled on the RAGBRAI route with champion cyclist Lance Armstrong.
After riding from just north of Dumont to Kesley, Edwards wrapped his arms around a several riders from Team Killer Bees for a photo, but declined be held aloft in their traditional sideways pose. “You’d drop me, then I couldn’t be president,” he joked.
“This is actually not hard, this is fun,” Edwards said as he climbed a hill on County Road T16 on a black Trek road bike he borrowed for the day. “The biggest problem is my butt hurts. Is that normal?”

In a field of vacuous Democrat candidates, he’s waaaaayyyyyyy out in front…

6 thoughts on “Miss John Edwards speaks”

  1. Hey, give the guy a break. I’m sure a line like that worked great at his college fraternity. You know, Phi Delta Moron.

  2. I Just wonder how the “Breck boy” managed to keep his hair from getting all messed up. Was his hairdresser along for the ride?

  3. No self-respecting male over the age of 17 would ever be caught dead riding a bike. A true man only uses either internal-combustion powered transport, or if he wants exercise, his feet. There are other, better ways to get exercise than a bike. Bikes are for the kiddies, pure and simple.

  4. I guess he can’t play a “cool” musical instrument while wearing shades, like Billy boy did on Arsenio Hall. Remember that classic maneuver?

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