On revolutionary icons and news not fit to print


Hey, guess what!  It turns out that Hugo Chavez is getting preferential treatment in Castrolandia.


And, in the process of reporting this, while admitting to the world that Castrolandia has a two-tier healthcare system, with de luxe facilities for a small number of ‘A-listers,” the Associated Press refers to Fidel Castro as a “revolutionary icon.”

Imagine Durwood Schnitzelbauer, a retired farmer in Funks Grove, Nebraska, commenting on this news story to his wife of fifty years, Mildred, who is in the loo and whose responses are muffled by a closed door.

Gee, Mildred, this is odd. I thought a great revolutionary icon would want to mingle with his people and settle for nothing other than a dose of the folk medicine that an egalitarian utopia dispenses to all of its noble savages in an eco-friendly way.


And, please tell me, Millie, what, exactly, is a revolutionary icon? How does any flesh-and-blood human earn such a title? And does it involve killing people, or is the mere posture of being against the status quo enough? Like, was that albino guy Andy Warhol a revolutionary icon? Or did he produce revolutionary icons? What about Napoleon Dynamite?


No, Millie, not Napoleon, but Napoleon Dynamite — you know, the guy in that movie from Idaho we saw last week on the Encore Channel?  Gee, just his name sounds revolutionary.


I suppose, Millie, when you get right down to it, revolutionary icon has a divine ring to it. Just think of the icons in a church. Yeah, that’s it. Icons are not just harmless, they actually help you when you pray to them. They say icons link you to the prototype in heaven. And if you kneel before them and light candles, like catholics, and kow-tow like Hindus, I guess you might think you  rise above the slime of this world.

Aah, Mildred. Why couldn’t you and I  turn into a revolutionary icons?  Weren’t we the first to plant genetically-engineered corn in Wazapamani County?  And the first to sell that corn to that revolutionary icon in Cuba, despite that awful blockade?


What’s that, Millie?  Whadzat? Whadda ya sayin’? Ya need some help, Millie?

Chavez reportedly at exclusive Cuba hospital

HAVANA (AP) — It’s a blocky, blush-colored building surrounded by a lush canopy of trees near the rumored home of Cuban revolutionary icon Fidel Castro.

Somewhere inside, as best as can be determined, Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez is fighting for his life.

People in Venezuela and other parts of the world await word on the fate of a man who once called George W. Bush “the devil” in a speech to the U.N. General Assembly, yet there are no journalists camped out on the sidewalk. Nobody gets past a police guard without proof of official business inside. Signs on surrounding streets warn that taking photographs is forbidden.

CIMEQ hospital’s well-earned reputation for guaranteeing the privacy of its elite clientele makes it the perfect place for the Venezuelan leader, who is bent on maintaining a large degree of secrecy about his battle against a cancer somewhere in the pelvic region. Venezuelan government officials have released few details on the cancer since it was first discovered in June 2011, and they’ve been no more forthcoming during his latest stay for a fourth surgery, on Dec. 11.

Keep reading more of this incisive report HERE. There are actually a couple of nuggets in the rest of the piece, such as:

Communist-run Cuba is legendary for being able to keep a secret,


CIMEQ serves ordinary Cubans for free under the island’s public health system, but it’s renowned as the go-to place for A-listers, from famed 91-year-old ballerina Alicia Alonso..to… [and there is an actual list]

and… it offers confirmation of the trend spotted by Babalu’s  own verbal surgeon, Humberto Fontova: “expert” has been replaced by “analyst”, probably due to a directive from the Ministry of Truth. This is evident in the following reference:

Sergio Diaz-Briquets, a Virginia-based analyst and the author of “The Health Revolution in Cuba.”

See what other gems you can find, ah-meee-goes.  And, while you’re at it, see what Saint Andy can do for you.   Rumor has it he is the patron saint of all who want to die in a hospital after a routine procedure.


5 thoughts on “On revolutionary icons and news not fit to print”

  1. Analyst? According to the Miami Herald, he would be a “Cubanologist.” Odd how the Herald doesn’t use similar terms like “NorthKoreanologist,” “Iraniologist,” “SaudiArabianologist,” etc.

Comments are closed.