Rejoice, Cubans, Rejoice! Hark, Hark! Dolce & Gabbana coming soon to the historic center of Old Havana!

Dolce & Gabbana Medium Sicily Mix Bag in Leather: $ 1,895.00

Wonderful news!   This will surely delight all Cubans, black, white, mulatto, or Asian — especially the 99% of them who earn 20 dollars a month!

The visit of some senior executives from Dolce & Gabbana to Havana has set the hearts of some of Havana’s elites racing, in anticipation of the dollars and euros that will flow into their coffers from an exclusive and very expensive luxury boutique clothing store where only about one percent of the Cuban people will be able to shop.

Tourists will provide Castro, Inc. with a great deal of revenue at this store, for sure, since the kleptocratic Castro monopoly demands a huge share of the profits from any foreign investment.

Rumor has it that the elites who control the real estate in the renovated tourist-friendly center of Old Havana have already selected a prime location in a charming antique building with 100 square meters of floor space.

The trend-setting Italian designers Domenico Dolce and Stefano Gabanna, who are based in Milan, have stores that cater to the rich and famous throughout Europe, South America, North America and Asia.

A spokesperson for Havanatur who is hosting the fashionistas from Milan had this to say to Marti Noticias:  “We expect to negotiate a very good deal, because the island [Cuba] is now fashionable and we don’t want to miss out on that.  Nonetheless, we don’t expect any surprises in a socialist Cuba where the people have been living in a dark austerity for over fifty years and haven’t been provided with a convenient market.”

What was that?  Granmaspeak, comrade.  Castrobabble, Compañero.  Translation: ” We expect to make a lot of money from tourists, not from Cubans.”

Learn more about this wonderful piece of news at Marti Noticias (in Spanish)

Also: If you don’t have access to one of these fabulous D& G fashion meccas, check out all the bargains at the Dolce and Gabbana online store.  See for yourself how affordable their merchandise is.  Here are some sample tropical Cuba-inspired items for ladies:

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Check it out, Mildred! They’re practically giving their stuff away!  This simple –yet elegant — ensemble costs only a total of $5,985.  Yes, that’s right, not an error: only five thousand nine hundred and eighty-five dollars.

Cuban women will love this store, for sure.  It will ONLY take the average Cuban woman 22 and a half years, more or less, to buy that ensemble, given that Cubans earn a whopping 22 dollars a month!  (Of course, it would mean saving every penny and not spending it on anything else for 22 and a half years, a small sacrifice for any noble savage to make).

Do the math, Mildred…. $22 times 12 months equals a yearly income of $264.  Divide $5,985 by $264 and the result is 22.67… Wow!

And for the gentleman…consider this silk suit, which  is on sale, greatly reduced from $ 4,895 to $ 2,937…. well under $3,000 — just a little over 11 years of one’s annual salary –for the Don Johnson Miami Vice look…  Imagine how the ladies would flock to any Cuban man dressed in such a suit!

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Or, this cotton polo shirt, a bargain at $ 425….. a mere one and a half years of a Cuban man’s yearly earnings!  Such a deal!

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3 thoughts on “Rejoice, Cubans, Rejoice! Hark, Hark! Dolce & Gabbana coming soon to the historic center of Old Havana!”

  1. What an absolute shameless, in-your-face sickening farce this ” communist revolution” has become, but of course, it still has plenty of defenders around the world. A “revolution” with Chanel fashion shows and Dolce and Gabbana boutiques, a “communist revolution” that sells Audi cars that no one but Mariela Castro and her brothers, sisters, children and cousins can afford! It’s as if castro’s lying description of what Cuba was supposed to have been pre-1959 [you know a country with a handful of wealthy oligarchs and masses of oppressed downtrodden peasants living off of prostitution and tourism] had come to life!

  2. Right, because extravagant self-indulgence in Manhattan or Milan is predictable, commonplace and routine, but doing it in the midst of oppression, misery, squalor and decay is so much more provocative and edgy, and it’s all about the frisson. One can’t do this, of course, in Haiti or the slums of Calcutta, but Cuba is endlessly permissive of perversity and obscenity, and if the rich and shallow can’t avail themselves of such an opportunity, well, what’s this world coming to?

  3. You are precisely right, Ray. The irony couldn’t be clearer or more pointed, except to those who simply refuse to see it. The brazen and grotesque hypocrisy of the Castro people, who are practically provoking anyone with half a brain to call BS on their “revolution,” is an indication of how deep the fraud goes–and I don’t mean in Cuba, where everyone knows it, but outside, where the usual suspects still largely stick to the old script. Castro, Inc. is not being careless or foolhardy with this shit; it knows it’s covered, just like Obama knows it when he pulls his shit. Lord, the disgust.

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