Most offensive Cuba stunt of the year: PETA goes slumming

Lechuga !!!
Lechuga !!!

Hey, Mildred, look, the Cuban people are about to get something they’ve always been needing: lectures from PETA (People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals).

Hot diggetty dawg….  (vegan dog, that is).

PETA is well known for its outrageous stunts, of course, but this one might be their most offensive, ever, as well as their dumbest.

Why is this anti-cruelty-to-animals pro-vegan-diet group going to Castrogonia, of all places?

Don’t they know that Cubans have little or no choice when it comes to what they eat?

Don’t they know that meat of any kind is very scarce for 99% of the population?

Don’t they know that it would be impossible for Cubans to follow a vegan diet, due to the scarcity of certain food items?

Don’t they know that street dogs in Castrogonia need much more than “dog treats”, or that these dogs could be someone’s next meal?

Don’t they know that human beings in Castrogonia are treated less humanely than animals?

Duh.  Of course not.  Whaddaya nuts or sumpthin’?  Geddouttaheah.

Why would they be any better informed than the rest of the American people as a whole, or less attracted to the thrill of slumming in a repressive hell-hole and gazing at the ill-fed primitive natives with utter contempt?

Why, Mildred, just last night I heard a very highly-placed world-class American scholar talking about the great Porterhouse steak he ate at a “private” restaurant in Castrogonia.  He had no clue that such a meal is totally inaccessible to Cubans.

Perros de Mierda !!!

Here are some consciousness-raising suggestions for these lettuce-bikini-clad animal rights maidens:

Before you deliver a single lecture to Cubans, go live in Castrogonia as Cubans for at least three months, trying to survive on a vegan diet as Cubans would do, on a ration card and an income of 20 dollars a month.

While you’re in Castrogonia, wear your lettuce bikinis all the time, no matter where you are or what you are doing.

Or, if that proves inconvenient, go naked.  After all many of your PETA ads against fur-wearing feature naked celebrities.

Join the Ladies in White for one of their Sunday events and be sure to get arrested and beaten along with them.  See if your conception of “ethical treatment” is affected in any way by the experience.

Ask Diana Nyad to join you.  She would look perfect in a lettuce bikini.  And she could teach you a trick or two about being really offensive to Cubans.

Offensive stunt master
Offensive stunt master

From Eljeral (Miami Herald):

These women are wearing lettuce bikinis for their mission to Havana

Practicing a bit of lettuce diplomacy, PETA plans to take its animal rights and eat vegan campaign to Cuba Tuesday.

Two “lettuce ladies” clad in bikinis covered with lettuce leaves plan to board a JetBlue Havana flight at Fort Lauderdale-Hollywood International Airport and spend the next few day delivering $1,000 worth of veterinary supplies, spreading the vegan message at private language schools and giving out canine treats to Cuban street dogs.

The lettuce ladies “are a fun way to teach about going vegan,” said Ashley Byrne, a spokeswoman for PETA, an organization whose mantra is “animals are not ours to eat or abuse in any other way.”

Yum !!!
Yum !!!

In case there are objections to their travel attire, the ladies will be carrying robes. “Dress codes are up to the discretion of the airline, but we hope they appreciate our message,” said Byrne, who is accompanying the ladies to the island and has herself been a lettuce lady on other occasions. “Obviously the most important thing is getting there.”

It’s PETA’s first foray into Cuba, but lettuce ladies have spread their vegan message far and wide, including an appearance in front of the Rayburn House Office Building in Washington. Bryne said this is the first time they will try to board a plane wearing strategically placed lettuce leaves.

They chose Cuba for the campaign because the island is now more accessible.

“We started discussing this as soon as restrictions on travel to Cuba were lifted,” said Byrne. “We’ve taken this campaign around the world and we absolutely wanted to take it to Cuba.”

Vamos bien !!!
Vamos bien !!!

2 thoughts on “Most offensive Cuba stunt of the year: PETA goes slumming”

  1. How appropriate, if not subversive: a butcher shop prominently displaying an image of the Argentine SOB known as “the butcher of La Cabaña” (La Cabaña being the prison where numerous summary executions he ordered took place). Truly inspirational, no?

    You think whoever painted that mural meant to make “Che” look like a snotty and effete Hollywood celebrity poseur doing the “radical chic” thing? Cause that’s definitely the way it turned out. Just sayin’.

  2. Well, at least these “vegan” bimbos aren’t eyesores like blubbering old sea cow Nyad. It’s not much, but it’s as much as we’re gonna get from such quarters.

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