Surprise! Cuban dictatorship finds clever way to end current food crisis

Jorge Luis Tapia: “Fish are the solution to all our problems”

From our Bureau of Delusional Socialist Suggestions with some assistance from our Bureau of Perfect Ways to Ensure Mosquito-Borne Illnesses

Castro, Inc.’s oligarchs have come up with some ingenious proposals for solving Cuba’s endemic food shortages. Fidel proposed extensive cultivation of Moringa, a plant from India. Other oligarchs have proposed ostriches, crocodiles, and a native rodent known as jutía. Trucutú Díaz-Canel suggested lemonade.

The latest suggestion comes from Castro Inc.’s Vice Prime Minister Jorge Luis Tapia, who has just proposed that all Cubans should build ponds in their patios, roofs, and backyards and create miniature fish farms.

Never mind the fact that most Cubans don’t have adequate space for fish ponds, especially in the cities. And never mind the steep learning curve required for successful fish farming, not to mention the water, equipment and food needed to create and maintain a healthy fish population in a tiny pond. Also, never mind the mosquitos who would love to breed in those ponds, and the tropical diseases they would spread, such as dengue, zika, and malaria.

Another brilliant idea! Get to it, Cubans, start building your ponds. Good luck with that. Yoani Sanchez provides details about this latest socialist solution to starvation.

Abridged from 14y Medio via Translating Cuba.  

Cuba’s unpopular Vice Prime Minister Jorge Luis Tapia has summoned us, speaking before the National Assembly of People’s Power, to create ponds in our backyards and dedicate ourselves to aquaculture. I am not going to dwell on the authoritarian and despotic tone with which he has launched his demand, because it is the typical way in which the bureaucrats of the Cuban Communist Party (PCC) speak to us, as if they were addressing soldiers and not citizens, as if the country were an immense barracks and we were Compulsory Military Service recruits.

Tapia, who has left the worst of reputations – for being inefficient, corrupt and oppressive – wherever they have placed him as leader of the PCC, has not the slightest idea of ??what he is ordering us to do. According to his explanation, in a few square meters we could create the pond that will take us out of the crisis and make our kitchens overflow with fish and our plates with fins. In a country with a serious problem of housing overcrowding, thinking that families can have space for something like this exceeds naivety to become evil. 

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3 thoughts on “Surprise! Cuban dictatorship finds clever way to end current food crisis”

  1. But Carlos, it’s the thought that counts. You know, the theory–same as socialism/communism/Marxism. The fact it doesn’t work in the real world is irrelevant. Besides, the Castronoids have to say something.

  2. You know the famous joke – If the Communists took over the Sahara, we would soon be hearing about a shortage of sand?
    Well, the Communists took over Cuba – an island! – and at once w heard about the shortage of fish and seafood

  3. Decades ago, my family sponsored a visit to the US for one of my Cuban uncles. He was lamenting the lack of food in Cuba. I was young and naive and suggested that Cubans needed to learn to fish. He had no comment but looked off into space, as if I my comment was inappropriate.

    You are correct Carlos, aqua farming is highly technical with high resource demands. It is inappropriate for the average Cuban and as the article says way over the head of any communist leader.

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