From our Bureau of Bizarre Puzzling Twists in Twenty-First Century Neocolonialism with some assistance from our Bureau of New Shady News Outlets
This is surprising. Where is the money coming from for this initiative? Could Russia be behind this move? It would make sense. Turning Castrogonia into a training center for Third World soldiers would give Grand Putinia a substantial logistical advantage.
Or could it be China that is behind this move? With all of the deals Castro, Inc. has been making with other anti-Western nations, it’s highly likely that a move like this was part of one or more of those “mutual cooperation” treaties.
And which nationalities will Castro, Inc.’s military incorporate? Venezuela and Nicaragua are obvious guesses, but so is the rest of Latrine America and the Third World, including Hamas, Hezbollah, Isis, and the Taliban.
By the way, the source for this story is a slick news outlet with leftist leanings and a penchant for AI-generated images. Today, it also posted an article touting Cuba as a great “budget friendly” vacation spot. Tres Fotutos couldn’t find any information online about this news source. The only “Gillette News” he could find was a newspaper in Gillette, Wyoming, which is definitely not focused on international news.
Stay tuned. This bizarre new twist is bound to have consequences soon enough.
From Gillette News
In an unexpected announcement, the Cuban government has made a significant departure from its longstanding tradition of exclusively accepting Cuban citizens into its armed forces. Now, the country is opening its doors to foreigners who wish to join the Cuban military. A decision that has raised eyebrows and sparked intrigue, this policy shift indicates a fresh approach to international relations and cooperation.
Why has Cuba decided to allow foreigners to join its army?
The Cuban government cites its dedication to strengthening international ties and fostering collaboration as the driving force behind this decision. By embracing foreigners in its military ranks, Cuba aims to promote unity, solidarity, and mutual understanding between the Cuban armed forces and those of other nations.
Who is eligible to join the Cuban army as a foreigner?
Foreign individuals aspiring to join the Cuban army must meet specific criteria. These include being between the ages of 18 and 30, holding a high school diploma or its equivalent, and passing rigorous physical and mental fitness tests. Furthermore, applicants must possess a clean criminal record and maintain good health.
What benefits do foreigners receive by joining the Cuban army?
Accepted foreign recruits will receive the same advantages as their Cuban counterparts. These include complimentary healthcare, housing, and a monthly salary. Additionally, they will have access to specialized training that can provide invaluable military experience.
Will foreigners be deployed outside of Cuba?
While no official statement has been made regarding the deployment of foreigners outside of Cuba, it is plausible that they may play a role in international peacekeeping missions or provide aid to countries in need. This aligns with Cuba’s historical support for nations during times of crisis.
This momentous decision by the Cuban government not only presents new prospects for individuals worldwide who are interested in military service but also symbolizes a shift toward a more all-encompassing and globally connected armed forces. The long-term effects of this policy alteration on Cuba’s military landscape and relationships with other nations remain to be seen.