From our Bureau of Socialist Solutions to Population Decline with some assistance from our Bureau of Scams and Phantom Perks in Socialist Utopias
This has got to be one of the most ridiculous initiatives launched by Castro, Inc in recent memory. To stem the exodus of young Cubans, it is offering young married couples the chance to jump to the head of the line, literally, and bypass the normal wait for scarce products such as mattresses, blankets, clothing, appliances, and furniture. It’s not giving away any such items, however, but selling them. And you can be sure these items are not discounted.
Oh, but the scam has run into a problem: most of the items being offered to young couples are actually NOT available. At one store, all that could be purchased were mops and brooms. Yes. That’s the way to keep young Cubans on the island so they will procreate and produce more slaves for Castro, Inc. Give ’em a chance to buy mops and brooms at full price. Sure. Brilliant.
Loosely translated from Diario de Cuba
In the midst of the severe food crisis, high prices of basic supplies in Cuba, and the ongoing migration exodus, the Ministry of Domestic Trade (MINCIN) of the island announced the sale of “various items to couples under 30 years old who officially married during July of this year,” according to a post on the entity’s Facebook profile.
According to this ministry, which has been the center of numerous citizen complaints, starting this week, those who meet the requirements “can formalize their requests in the designated departments, accompanied by the certificate issued by the Provincial Justice Directorate and their respective identification documents.”
Although Elaine Porro Izquierdo, the principal specialist of the Business Group of Commerce in Camagüey, explained to the local official newspaper Adelante that “the newlyweds will be able to purchase household items, clothing, appliances, mattresses, and furniture, among other offers,” Cubans doubt the real impact of this measure and whether the offers will be as substantial as the authorities claim amidst the widespread crisis in the country.
In this regard, the internet user Yordanis Ricardo Labrada commented on the MINCIN’s Facebook profile that “in Holguín, they are selling a broom and a mop,” which shows how little the ministry has to offer Cubans.
However, Adelante highlighted that in Camagüey, “the units conceived for this option, which has been somewhat similar to one that existed several years ago, are Tropicana Moda, for residents in the provincial capital, and Orbe, for couples from the rest of the province.” Nonetheless, the official media did not detail what would be sold or at what prices, despite Porro Izquierdo stating that “these resources have a differentiated and lower cost compared to those currently available in the state market.”
At the same time, while the regime sells “a broom and a mop” to its newlyweds, hoping they will not leave the country, the state travel agency Cubatur announced the celebration of the ExpoBodas Habana 2024 event in November at the Hotel Habana Libre, intending to promote the island as a destination for weddings and quinceañera parties.
The purpose of the event, according to the specialized website Travel Trade Caribbean, “is to showcase Cuba as an elegant and unique destination for weddings; in this regard, the diversity and promotion of the offers will be presented to tour operators, travel agencies, and potential clients for weddings and quinceañera parties in the country.”
In a country with evident and increasingly pressing issues with food, transportation, electricity, water, and other elements, ExpoBodas Habana 2024 will feature “representatives from hotel chains, operators and travel agencies, airlines, photography studios, catering services, space renters, dress rental services, and transport providers,” Travel Trade Caribbean indicated.
While the regime promotes this policy to attract foreign visitors, even at the expense of its citizens’ well-being, the “newlywed care program” adds to the supposed sale of a food module for children turning 15.
As detailed by the official newspaper Escambray in July, this would consist of granting families of the minors “the right to purchase a cake, sandwich rolls, cookies, cheese, cream cheese, a bag of soda or syrup, a package of hot dogs, and a one-kilogram tube of ham.”
4o
It’s all devolved into a really bad joke, but since there’s no shame, let alone class, it makes no difference to the Castronoids. This sort of shit is all they’ll ever come up with, since they’re bankrupt in every sense.
And yes, I feel sorry for the newlyweds. They deserve better from life than what they can have in Cuba.