Cuban dictatorship opens gourmet culinary festival at apartheid resort enclave while Cubans starve

Food for superior beings only

From our Bureau of Extreme Shamelessness with some assistance from our Let Them Eat Cats and Rats Bureau

Le zumba! Now, this is what you can call infinite chutzpah. Castro, Inc. has outdone itself. Food has never been so scarce and in the midst of this famine you hold an international culinary festival at one of your apartheid resorts.

And then, to top it off, you announce your food fest by employing ridiculously offensive platitudes that are so out of touch with the reality your people are experiencing that they actually mock and taunt them mercilessly. Take a close look at the highlighted phrases in the article below.

Socialism in action! Some animals are more equal than others, as Orwell’s pigs say in his novel Animal Farm. And, speaking of Orwell, Castro, Inc. has added a new maxim —“Hunger is Bliss”— to the three maxims created by Orwell’s Ministry of Truth in his novel 1984

Yeah. Add that to these three: “War is Peace,” “Freedom is Slavery,” and “Ignorance is Strength.” 

Food for Cubans (“ground beef”)

Read more

Superior of Jesuit order expelled from Cuba for criticizing the island’s dictatorship

David Pantaleón, S.J. and some of his flock

From our Bureau of Thin-Skinned Socialist Despots with some assistance from our Bureau of Uppity Clerics

Arresting and imprisoning a Jesuit priest might have irritated Papa Che a bit too much (since he belongs to the Jesuit order), so, instead of throwing him in one of its many dungeons, Castro, Inc. has decided to expel him.

No doubt about it, if this man were not a Jesuit priest, and the head of that order in Castrogonia, he would be in prison right now.

But how will this move sit with Papa Che? Might he be slightly upset? After all, he’s always calling for “dialogue,” and this expulsion is a blatant rejection of “dialogue.” Let’s see if he has anything to say about this latest display of repression and poor Church-state dialogue by Castro, Inc.

Read more

Face it, world, Cuba IS a failed state that can only be fixed by a global boycott against its dictatorship

From our Bureau of Self-Evident Truths

Marlene Azor Hernández has written a very perceptive essay for CubaNet, in which she decries the worldwide phenomenon of denying that Castrogonia is a failed state.

Her arguments are so cogent and convincing in and of themselves that she doesn’t even have to cite statistics or to mention the World Misery Index, which placed Castrogonia at the top of the list in 2021.

The only “decent remedy” for this situations, she argues, would be for all nations on earth to admit the total failure of the so-called “Revolution” and to boycott Castro, Inc., ,

As she says, a “world boycott of the totalitarian Cuban dictatorship, the only current way of forcing Havana to sit down at a negotiating table, with international supervision and with the presence of the entire independent civil society of the Island, which has solid proposals for well-being in all lines of society.”

Read more

Don’t cry for me Argentina: A very Latrine American moment

Here is what this Argentinian TV host had to say as he celebrated the death of Queen Elizabeth.

“The old daughter of a whore has died. It’s over, finally, loud applause for Satan who took her away. She is finished. I promised that we were going to toast the death of this British piece of trash, this Lucifer filth.”

(Se murió la vieja hija de puta. Terminó de una buena vez, fuerte aplauso para satanás que se la llevó. Se ha terminado. Yo le prometí que íbamos a brindar cuando se muriera esta basura británica, esta inmundicia de Lucifer”)

Watch video HERE

When asked to comment, Argentina’s vice president responded as one would expect.

Many Argentines have never recovered from their humiliating its loss to Britain in the Falkland Islands War.

In addition to practicing apartheid, Spanish hotel chains in Cuba serve as agents of repression

Hotel Iberostar Coral Level Esmeralda, Cayo Cruz

From our Bureau of Socialist Multitasking with some assistance from our Bureau of European Agents of Repression in Latrine America

You’ve got to admit that Castro, Inc. excels at one task: repression. And you’ve also got to admit that its contempt for the Cuban people is limitless.

And while you’re at it, you’ve also got to admit that Spanish hoteliers are intensely complicit in the repression of the Cuban people.

If you’re not ready to come to terms with these truths, let a young Cuban employee of a Spanish hotel convince you. His tale reveals very clearly that hotels in Cuba are headquarters for the military and the dictatorship’s repressive machinery, which use them as bases for harassing Cuban employees and for recruiting them as agents of repression.

Recruiting and Harassing Center Hotel Iberostar Coral Level Esmeralda, Cayo Cruz

Read more

Mexican president AMLO vows to keep importing Cuban slave doctors

From our Bureau of Twenty-First Century Neoslavery with some assistance from our Bureau of Typical Latrine American Behavior

Yes, more of the same, with oomph. Mexico’s leftist president is very proud of his determination to hire slave laborers from Castrogonia, and likes to boast about how this irritates his opponents and international human rights organizations.

He is also promising free medical care to all Mexicans. Yes, just like Castrogonia. You know what this means.

Loosely translated from CiberCuba

Mexico’s president, Andrés Manuel López Obrador, promised that he will continue hiring Cuban doctors in his country and that in a few months there will be free healthcare for all Mexicans.

In a morning press conference from the Mexican state of Zacatecas, the president explained to a journalist that the universalization of health services has already begun and has Cuban personnel.

“Health is being federalized. It is going to be guaranteed, it is my commitment, it is quite a challenge, but by the middle of next year we will have a quality, universal, free health system throughout Mexico,” López Obrador told the reporter, interested in transformations in education, health and public works of the country.

According to the president, this is a process already underway in three states: Colima, Tlaxcala and Nayarit, where there are dozens of Cuban doctors who supply more than 500 of the 14,323 vacancies that were available from his “Health Plan for Wellness”, in which the Mexican government has already spent 7,000 million pesos.

Regarding the Cuban doctors, he highlighted their presence in the country and insisted that he would bring others, even if it upset political opponents.

“We are not going to stop thanking the Cuban people and government because Cuban doctors and specialists are working in the hospital in Fresnillo, Zacatecas, as they are doing in other hospitals in Nayarit, in Colima,” he said.

“And we are going to continue hiring specialist doctors in Cuba and in other countries… even if it hurts my opponents,” he said, promising guaranteed specialists and medications for Mexicans.

Images of the Day: King Charles III in Cuba, land of noble savages

From our Bureau of Dream Holidays with some assistance from our Bureau of Fun and Games

Back in 2019, while they were still Prince of Wales and Duchess of Cornwall, the new king and queen consort of the UK had a rollicking good time in Castrogonia.

Here are some photos of their dream holiday in the worker’s paradise of the Caribbean, where they mingled with all sorts of noble savages whose artistry and expertise represented the very best characteristics of the local culture..

And, as a bonus, here is a game you can play, too, courtesy of our brand new Bureau of Fun and Games. All of the photos below are genuine, except for one.

Are you smart enough to pick out the photo NOT taken in Castrogonia?

Read more

Cuban dictatorship declares official mourning period for Queen Elizabeth, eagerly licks boots of new King Charles III

El Rey de los Mojitos

From our Bureau of Extremely Overt Hypocritical Boot-Licking with some assistance from our Land of Dream-Holiday-Seekers Bureau

Wow. This is bizarre, but somewhat predictable. Castro, Inc. has gone out of its way to ingratiate itself with the new monarch of the UK and its Commonwealth by offering insincere condolences to the royal family and calling on Cubans to observe a mourning period during which all Cuban flags are to be flown at half mast.

The late Queen Elizabeth never visited Cuba during her very long reign, but her son and successor Charles III paid a visit not very long ago, in the course of which he and his queen consort seemed to have a jolly good time. Jolly good.

El Rey del Guarapo

In addition to maintaining economic relations favorable to Castro, Inc., the UK and its Commonwealth of nations (especially Canada) provide Castrogonia with a steady stream of tourists.

So, no surprise that Trucutú Díaz-Canel and his Minister of the Exterior Brunito “El Maldito” Rodríguez are both publicly exclaiming, “De Quín is dé, lonlif de Kin of Mojitos” (Se murió la Reina, Viva el Rey de los Mojitos!”),,, while at the same time mocking anyone who falls for their hypocritical stunt and spewing insults privately such as: “Estiró la pata la viejuca fea, y ahora podemos negociar con su hijo el comemierda.”

Read more

As blatant apartheid intensifies and sky-high prices get higher, Cuban hotels remain 85.6% empty

Terrace of Packard Hotel, Havana

From our Annals of Apartheid Tourism Bureau

Never mind the fact that apartheid at Varadero Beach in Matanzas is no different from that of South Africa’s infamous Sun City, which all leftists around the world boycotted back in the 80″s. As Diario Las Americas points out, no one anywhere seems bothered by this, not even diaspora Cuban Yo-Yos who stay in Castro Inc.. hotels.

But this apartheid industry is not doing too well. Castro, Inc. keeps building luxury hotels and resorts, but the tourists are staying away. Hotels remain mostly empty and if it weren’t for the 214,122 Canadians and 151,000 Cuban diaspora Yo Yos who booked stays in Castro, Inc.’s hotels — who made up about half of the total number who booked rooms — the percentage of empty rooms would have been around 95% rather than 85.6%.

Thank you Canadians and Yo-Yos. Aaah, those Cuban Yo-Yo tourists, so loyal to Castro, Inc., so comfortable with supporting apartheid, so pleased with their ability to enjoy special privileges in their own land, among their own people.

And speaking of apartheid, (read this carefully, Yo-Yos), a Cuban Man who was walking down a street in Vedado, Havana, was expelled from the sidewalk at the Grand Aston hotel. “It’s the second time this happens to me,” he said. “You’d think this was an embassy belonging to another country.” Watch video HERE, listen to his story.

And . . . a Cuban who dared to go for coffee at the Grand Packard hotel was horrified to find that it charges 330 pesos ($13.75) for an expresso and 450 ($18.76) for a capuchino. Never mind that the average monthly salary earned by Cubans is 353 pesos, exchangeable for just $14. “These prices are insane!”, said this Cuban on YouTube. “They’re meant to keep Cubans out.”

Enjoy your coffee, Canadians and Yo-Yos.

Read more

Jailed dissident Luis Manuel Otero Alcántara wins $50,000 award for his ‘positive contributions’ to Cuba’s development

From our Bureau of Laudable Disrespect for Leftist Dictatorships

Here’s an item that’s bound to irritate the hell out of the military junta that runs Castrogonia. One of their least favorite artists has just won a major award that amounts to 122 years of income (The average income in Castrogonia is $408 per year). And to make things worse, the prize money is being safeguarded until he is freed from prison and can actually keep all of it.

In the past, Castro, Inc. has required the winners of cash awards to hand over to them every penny, arguing that all prizes belong to “the Cuban people” rather than the individual prize winner. How’s that for social justice?

By rewarding a prisoner of conscience and ensuring that he can collect his price, the Prince Claus Dutch Fund has just disrespected Castro, Inc. in more ways than one. But, given the proclivities of Castro, Inc., and their incredible luck in being supported by affluent democracies everywhere — which means they could stay in power indefinitely — there’s a good chance that Luis Manuel will never get to collect his prize money.

Read more