Maduro announces foolproof utopian plan for Cubazuela’s future

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ABC Spain reports:

In an astounding feat of logic and eloquence, Viceroy of the Cubazuelan colony of Caracastan, Nicolás Maduro, has just called on all young families in his realm to have more children in order to double the population and “occupy the entire territory.”

“A parir se ha dicho, responsablemente”, he thundered. (Let’s pop out those babies, reponsibly).  “Venezuela can grow.  We can easily reach a population of 60 million –right now we are only 30 million.  We need a strong population, much more than in sheer numbers, so we can occupy the entire territory.”

These remarks were made during the premiere of a new television network for the colony’s armed forces: TV  Fuerza Armada Nacional Bolivariana (TVFanb).

“Keep popping out those babies,” he insisted,  pointing out that the government would take care of of all of their needs, including “education, food, culture, good examples, and life.”

Nothing was said about how the government would be able to take care of everyone, or about the environmental impact of this population explosion.  Nothing was said either about how much such a plan resembles the many hare-brained schemes of Fidel Castro, King Emeritus of Cubazuela.

For the whole thing in Spanish, go HERE.

 

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